Loading ...How To Overcome Self-Pity
Society usually responds to self-pity in a negative way. It’s so much easier to see it in other people than in ourselves. You know you are wallowing in self-pity when you start using two famous little words, “poor me”. Poor me this, that, no one appreciates me, I can’t get ahead, people are always taking advantage of me, no one loves me, no one cares about me, I don’t have enough money.
Most of us may have acted in self-pity at one time or another. It seems to work because we feel comfort and protection from the invisible shield that is cast. The worst part is that it keeps us from growing in life and getting what we want. People that wallow in self-pity are ones that don’t know how to achieve what they want in life. You can tell if someone is acting in self-pity because they like to blame everyone but of themselves.
There are many different kinds of self-pity. See if you can recognize some of them.
One of these forms is that of the victim. Victims always ask “why me?” and always say “life isn’t fair.” They are people that do good deeds but end up getting cheated somehow. They help walk a person across the street and they end up getting sued. They help fix a tire for another car on the side of a freeway and end up getting their car stolen.
Another kind is the blamer. Blamers like to point fingers so that someone else or some other unseen force outside of themselves is responsible for their misfortunes. These fingers are bigger than the foam ones that you see at sporting events. Blamers are the ones that love to take their frustrations out on other people or things. They are the ones throwing chairs or dishes across the room.
Have you ever come across the self-pity critic? They are the ones that always make comparisons to other successful people. They end up asking why other people’s good luck and fortune don’t happen to them since they are just as good as other people. Critics think they can do better than others if they only had the chance. The problem with critics is that they sit back, are all talk and don’t do anything to improve their life. Like, the old saying goes, you’ll never know if you don’t try.
So what can you do to break away from the self-pity cycle?
First, keep a promise to yourself that you will no longer start to wallow in self-pity. Anytime you find yourself doing that, turn your focus into trying to keep that promise to yourself. You are simply conditioning yourself to let go of self-pity whenever it shows up.
Second, write down a list of 5 benefits that you will receive for letting go of self-pity. Will you be happier? Will you gain confidence? Or will you be healthier? Every morning, take a look at that list and remind yourself all the great benefits that you get to experience.
Finally, be on the side of individuals who look at the glass half full. Having a positive outlook on life only attracts more optimistic energy. This will be all that you need to start a new cycle of your life.
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