The world is filled with people whose attitude is nothing more than “I owe you and you owe me.” You have most likely known someone in your life that lives on favors. It isn’t hard for you to figure out that someone is tallying up a total. The best way to live life is to recognize that success is gained by giving without keeping score. Keeping score will ultimately lead to failure in life.

Almost everyone on this planet has been guilty for keeping score. You may have even done so on a small scale. Let me give two examples that many of you can relate to. Have you ever been to lunch with a group of six friends and for some reason one person of the group always cheats the others when the bill comes? Then you exclude that person from the next lunch because you paid more than your fair share. How about the time your friends didn’t invite you to a party and you didn’t invite them to the next one just get back at them?

So what are the two lessons that you should learn from keeping score? The first lesson here is to let go of the scorekeeper in you. Relationships, whether they are friends, acquaintances, business contacts or romance, grow when you give without expecting anything back. The most important thing you need to know is that what you give you get back. You may not get what you really want now, but the first thing that comes back to you is that you get the reward of having done something good for someone.

Lesson number two is to make it your lifestyle to give. Giving is the key that builds real relationships, not delivering and expecting payments. Once it becomes natural to you, you will find out that you will become more successful along with your friends and contacts. You will also get to set free the obsession of scorekeeping.

So how can you start to make giving your lifestyle? It’s really all a mental approach. Try this exercise out. Begin by closing your eyes, relaxing and taking deep breaths while imagining that you no longer keep score. Now start to visualize how you might feel in your relationships, your work and your friendships without keeping score. Are you beginning to feel peaceful and sound? This is how life will feel like without all that stress. It’s just easier not to keep score.

Just because you stopped keeping score doesn’t mean that you should let yourself be taken advantage of. When you give, don’t give because you have to. Just do the things that make you feel truly good inside. Just try it for a while and then decide for yourself if this change in mindset has helped to enhance your life.

Don’t be afraid to stop scorekeeping. You will never run out of things to give. Go right ahead and spend a week or even a day giving without expectation. Enjoy the good feeling that comes with your charity. In the end, the positive karma will make your life even better than you have it now.

The principle explains that all you need to do is merely associate yourself with the kind of people that you want to develop into. If you are aspiring to be a nobel prize winning scientist, then you hang out with other great scientists. If your goal is to be a successful real estate investor, then you want to seek out others that have been successful in real estate investing. These examples may sound very simple, but their effects are astonishing

It is a known fact that your friends and associates are the people that you care most about, the ones you spend most of your time with, the ones you speak to the most and the ones that you truly care about what they think of you. Although you don’t realize it, but as time goes on, you will start to subconsciously act the way your friends do. You will notice that you will speak like they speak, dress like they dress and think like they think.

Stop and try this exercise right now. Think of the people that you spend most of your time with. Do they encourage you to excel in life and reach for your goals? Or do they drag you down with them? Do they live their lives in ways that truly inspire you? Are they people of worth and sincere morals? It is important to ask these questions to yourself because everyday that passes by, these people’s behaviors and thoughts become your own little by little.

It is essential that you choose the surroundings you live in carefully because the setting that you choose will eventually shape you into the person you will become. Be wary of the kinds of friends that you choose because the environment will gradually cause you to become like them. If being successful has high importance value to you, then associate yourself with other people that are successful.

By following the principle of success by association and choosing the right environment to be in, you will be well on your way to having a meaningful and successful life.

You need to realize if you have a habit of not completing your goals, dreams or projects.  Right now is a great time to break that habit and create new ones so that you can live life way the way you want. When you are able to follow through on your goals, you will be able to recognize that you have certain abilities and talents that you never knew you had.

It’s not too late to complete goals that you may have put aside years ago. All you need is the desire to make it happen. One great example of this desire to comeback and finish a goal is in the movie Return of the Jedi. In that movie, Luke Skywalker returns to see Yoda to complete his Jedi training. His training was interrupted from the last movie Empire Strikes Back. That is the sort of passion that will help carry you in completing your goals.

Many people may think that life gets very boring and stagnant once you complete your current objectives. This is far from the case. It just means that you have mastered one part of your life. Goals are merely destination points for you to get to. You may find that along the way, new desires can pop up anytime. You may also find that some dreams can change and you may not want them anymore or want something else. Once you arrive at your destination, it’s time to evaluate and set a course for new goals and objectives. You want to be so skilled at following through that you create this special ability to do what we say. 

So how do we start training for this unique skill? First, let me tell you about how nature works. In life, there is always a beginning, a middle and an end. Think of how a flower grows. It starts out as a seed, grows big, petals start blooming, petals fall and the flower dies.

Most people stop in the middle because they can’t take the criticism, fear that others will laugh at their ideas or they feel unappreciated. Some don’t even start at all because of the reasons I mentioned before. So they would rather sit around and do nothing than do something because they got their pride hurt.

It may seem impossible to motivate someone again when they have gone through life thinking that no one seems to care. Even if you already follow through on all your plans, these tips can help you become even better at it. In doing so, it will allow you to experience more from life. These techniques can also help you to help others.

1)  To begin, you should spend some time to reflect on life. Where you’ve been, where you’re going, what you’ve accomplished and what you feel is still missing in your life. Create a list of goals that you have completed so far. This can be anything, from big to small and anywhere in between.

You may have finished college or high school, made the honor roll in 4th grade, kissed Susie in 6th grade, got the job and girlfriend you wanted, or fixed up the racer car. Now bring back those memories on how good it felt when you accomplished this. No do the same for the goals that you didn’t get to complete so far. What is it that you still want that has been lingering from the past?

2) Life is a continuous cycle of starting, continuing and stopping. Most of the time, the cycle is incomplete because people don’t know where to start to get where they want. They may also end their goals early because they fear completing a task and getting criticized for it. You can be a movie director coming out with a new movie, but halt production halfway because of what others may think when you finish it.

Look at your list and move on by recognizing that a goal is completed. As I mentioned before, completion just means that you are finished with one step of life. If you have incomplete projects and goals, you may want to take a look to see what the reason behind it is. It may be caused by the natural human tendency to hold on to things. One example is of parents who can’t let their kids go, even when they have moved out of the house 15 years ago.

What unfinished business do you have in terms of relationships, work, career or finances? Having this kind of list will help you going in right direction. Look at the list and eliminate goals that you no longer want. This can save you energy from worrying about achieving a goal you no longer care for. Your list may also include tasks that you don’t want to handle yourself. If that is the case, then find someone that is willing to help you out. Once all this is done, you can finally arrive at a list of goals that you want to finish yourself. Go and complete the unfinished business and you can start making a new list and looking forward to the future.

Remember not to force yourself to do anything. It will cause you to shut down. Remember how it felt when you were forced to work or do things? When that happens we encounter resistance. If it is some past unfinished goal that you have, decide if you want to finish it or move on. Attempt to get on a roll to produce consistent results. The more success you have doing this, the more confidence and power you will gain. Follow the cycle of nature. Start, follow through and complete your goals. The great thing about it is that it’s not too late and you can do this starting now. Satisfaction and success will bring you to a new high that’s worth experiencing.

No doubt, some mistakes that we make can be very painful and difficult experiences. We live and grow up in a society that looks down upon making mistakes. Heck, each time you answer a question wrong on a test in school, the closer to the F grade you get. It’s time to break away from that view of society. The beauty of life is how we respond to these mistakes as an individual that determines our individual growth for the future. This article is about four ways on how to respond to your mistakes and turn yourself around to achieve success?

First of all, like I explained in my introduction of this site, the most important lesson in responding to mistakes is that you have to take 100% responsibility for your actions. You have to admit that you made the mistake and stop pointing fingers or blaming others for your mistakes. You have to be held accountable for making your mistakes. Once you get that sense of responsibility, it will enable you to grow better through these experiences. Without this, you will never ever grow!

Second, after a mistake is made, go through the learning process and think about how you can grow from these experiences. You should focus on the valuable lessons that you can learn from making the mistake. There is no doubt that it is a difficult and challenging period soon after a mistake is made. In these kinds of times, you should focus on the the best solution possible and stay positive knowing that you will get through this and grow well as a person.

Third, after making a mistake, the chance of being criticized and embarrassed by others is very high. This is a typical and normal human response. Some common statements that you usually hear are “I told you so!” or “What were you thinking?” It definitely isn’t a pleasant experience getting yelled at. Nevertheless, did you know that this is a great opportunity for you to grow? There isn’t a sweeter feeling than growing better in the face of your critics.

If you look back in the history of society, the most successful people overcame criticisms to become successful. Once they overcame these mistakes and challenges, their success was a sweeter and more meaningful experience for them. So how do you overcome your mistakes while facing your critics? Just listen to yourself instead of letting the criticisms affect you negatively. Focus on rising to the challenge and tell yourself that your response will ultimately play a big part in making you grow into a better person.

Finally, as an individual responding to mistakes and developing growth to success, you should have that desire to continually learn and grow. The moment we stop learning is the moment we stop growing into a better person. Just remember that every mistake that we make is a chance for us to grow more successful. So, in conclusion, making mistakes is a part of life. It is a critical process in developing ones personal growth. As long as you respond in a positive way and learn from the mistakes, you will be well on your way to being successful.

Please feel free to leave comments and feedback on any of my articles. In addition, tell me what other personal development topics you want to hear about. Thanks

Big Secret #1: Have a vision of what you want.
You should have a clear idea of what you want. Every hockey player wants the Stanley Cup and every Olympian wants a gold medal. They have a vision that helps keep them motivated and on track. They see how the trophy is like, they feel how the gold medal is like and they experience the joy of winning in their minds and hearts.

Big Secret #2: Make the plan.
You should have a clear and thought out strategy that will lead you to success. Only you know what you need to do and when you need to do it. A big point is to write it down so that you stay focused and avoid any alternative plans that do not get you closer to your goal.

Big Secret #3: It’s all in the passion.
Successful people live and breathe their passion. This is what helps them wake up the next morning very excited and ready to go. Without it, dreams are just that…dreams. Find the passion in you that will help on the road to your goals and dreams.

Big Secret #4: The truth and nothing but the truth.
Highly successful people that win on a consistent basis do not live on denial, fantasy or fiction. They are self-critical of themselves. You don’t have to go as far as giving thumbs down like Ebert and Roper though. Just hold yourself to high, but realistic standards. We know it’s impossible to build your house in 4 days.

Big Secret #5: Build your All-Star team.
Remember the first Dream Team in basketball that competed in the Olympics? They won the gold medal with no competition. That’s what happens when you surround yourself with a group of people who want you to succeed. These are the mentors and motivators that help you to reach your goals. Choose and befriend those that have skills, talents and abilities that you do not. Like the Dream Team, Larry Bird can shoot 3 pointers, Michael Jordan can drive to the basket and Magic Johnson was a good passer. This combination made them completely unstoppable and that’s what you should aim for.

Big Secret #6: Take action.
Nike said it best. Just Do it! If you want to be successful don’t just sit around and think about what you want to do. You have to go out there and get it. God will not drop off that pretty girl at your doorstep. Try to take daily meaningful steps that will lead you toward your goals and dreams.

Big Secret #7: Take risks.
Successful people are willing to get out of their comfort zones and try new things. Take the risk in order to have more. You absolutely have nothing to lose. The best thing that will come out of taking risks are the lessons learned. It’s ok to make mistakes, that’s what life is all about. So be willing to dive into the unknown world if you have to.

Big Secret #8: Have some flexibility.
I’m not talking about trying to turn into Plastic Man or Gumby here. I am talking about having that plan of yours being open to input. Remember that in life, even the best laid plans don’t go as planned. That’s ok because by being flexible you can come up with an alternate road to your goal.

Please feel free to leave comments and feedback on any of my articles. In addition, tell me what other personal development topics you want to hear about. Thanks