photo credit: LivyAnn

Romantic date ideas come naturally for some of you. For most others, we need lessons in romance. The fact is that we just don’t know how to be romantic. It isn’t because we shy away from it.

Nevertheless, dating idea help is on the way. The following 3 ideas you are about to discover will surely help you win the heart of the one you love. These ideas can also be used as a valentine’s day idea. Be prepared to impress your new date or long term sweetie with an amazing experience using these romance tips.

1: Fun night.

Turn your date into a night of entertainment. You and your sweetheart can play classic board games such as Monopoly and Life or card games such as Uno. If you are more into the latest technology, then play video games with each other.

These games are the build up to a romantic evening as you can wind down and watch a movie. Go make yourself some delicious popcorn to share with your sweetheart. While watching the movie, sit close and cuddle up. The competition in the games earlier creates a unique bond between the two of you.

2: Dine in.

Turn your place into a romantic dinner. There is nothing more romantic than having a candle light dinner at your own table. You create the delicious food and go all out to set the mood. You can put pretty flowers into a beautiful vase to place on the table. You should also shower, smell good and dress to impress. Include a small bottle of wine with your table decorations.

Have soft and romantic music playing while you eat. Compose a small message on nice stationary paper for them to read. Let them know how special they are to you. Most important of all, make sure this is a total surprise so be careful not to say anything prior to dinner.

3: Dine out.

We are not talking about going to a restaurant. An outdoor picnic is just the surprise you need for your sweetheart. It may even be better than 10 romantic gifts. Outdoor picnics are old fashioned and go back to the times when life was much more simpler. You can prepare an outdoor picnic for breakfast or for lunch. You can possibly make dinner if the area you live in has light all day round.

You do not need to make it anything fancy. A simple tuna sandwich will do just fine. Make sure you plan the location accordingly and try to choose a place that is close to water or has a great view. Look for a place that will provide you with loads of privacy where you can sweet talk with your partner. Also bring a blanket that the two of you can sit on. If you can make the outdoor picnic a surprise, then you have a romantic event set up perfectly for you.

The world is filled with people whose attitude is nothing more than “I owe you and you owe me.” You have most likely known someone in your life that lives on favors. It isn’t hard for you to figure out that someone is tallying up a total. The best way to live life is to recognize that success is gained by giving without keeping score. Keeping score will ultimately lead to failure in life.

Almost everyone on this planet has been guilty for keeping score. You may have even done so on a small scale. Let me give two examples that many of you can relate to. Have you ever been to lunch with a group of six friends and for some reason one person of the group always cheats the others when the bill comes? Then you exclude that person from the next lunch because you paid more than your fair share. How about the time your friends didn’t invite you to a party and you didn’t invite them to the next one just get back at them?

So what are the two lessons that you should learn from keeping score? The first lesson here is to let go of the scorekeeper in you. Relationships, whether they are friends, acquaintances, business contacts or romance, grow when you give without expecting anything back. The most important thing you need to know is that what you give you get back. You may not get what you really want now, but the first thing that comes back to you is that you get the reward of having done something good for someone.

Lesson number two is to make it your lifestyle to give. Giving is the key that builds real relationships, not delivering and expecting payments. Once it becomes natural to you, you will find out that you will become more successful along with your friends and contacts. You will also get to set free the obsession of scorekeeping.

So how can you start to make giving your lifestyle? It’s really all a mental approach. Try this exercise out. Begin by closing your eyes, relaxing and taking deep breaths while imagining that you no longer keep score. Now start to visualize how you might feel in your relationships, your work and your friendships without keeping score. Are you beginning to feel peaceful and sound? This is how life will feel like without all that stress. It’s just easier not to keep score.

Just because you stopped keeping score doesn’t mean that you should let yourself be taken advantage of. When you give, don’t give because you have to. Just do the things that make you feel truly good inside. Just try it for a while and then decide for yourself if this change in mindset has helped to enhance your life.

Don’t be afraid to stop scorekeeping. You will never run out of things to give. Go right ahead and spend a week or even a day giving without expectation. Enjoy the good feeling that comes with your charity. In the end, the positive karma will make your life even better than you have it now.

Number 1: Make sure you smile at the new person. It is often the first type of contact you have with a person. It is a very powerful form of non-verbal communication. Smiles are free, easy to do and can lead you naturally to a conversation.

Number 2: Make good eye contact. This is another powerful form of non-verbal communication. There is a saying that “The eyes are the windows to a person’s soul.” Holding eye contact is a sign of confidence so don’t look at the floor right after looking into her eyes. Doing so will make you look shy or disinterested.

Number 3: Speak up and say “hello.” Do you remember when you were a child and your parents told you not to speak until you are spoken to? Hopefully everyone doesn’t follow that rule. If they did, then we would live in a really silent world. Go ahead, break that rule when it comes to meeting a new person.

Number 4: Use a firm handshake when meeting someone new. Just be sure not to squeeze their hand so tight that he or she will end up with broken bones. If so, then watch out because you’ll never get another chance to make a good first impression

Number 5: Go to places that have the kinds of people you want to attract. If you want to meet other professionals, then join a professional organization. If you love hiking, then join a local hiking club. If you want to meet people with similar morals, beliefs, and values, try a church, synagogue or temple. The key is to put yourself out there in places have the same people that you are interested in. Remember, it is hard to attract new people when you are lounging around all alone at home watching reruns of American Idol.

Number 6: Dress the same as the people you want to attract. If you want to attract new customers, then you will need to dress like a businessman. Completely outfit yourself with a suit and tie. If you want to meet someone that is conservative, then do not wear something that is flashy or revealing. If you want to attract the 1960’s hippie crowd, then by all means, dress like one! The goal is to dress similar to the people that you want to meet

Number 7: Be honest, be positive and be brief. There is nothing that builds trust faster than being honest with the person that you have met for the first time. Don’t lie and tell them that you drive a Ferrari 450 when you really drive a 10 year old beat up car. Be positive because others like to spend time with these types of people as opposed to the negative thinking types. It’s all in the attitude! So don’t start off and tell them how much you hate your ex-girlfriend. Be brief, that way you have plenty of time for number 8

Number 8: Listen up to your new acquaintance! Everyone in society has this desire to feel significant. The easiest way to show someone that you are interested in them is to listen to what they have to say

Number 9: Be happy and content with everything that is going on in your life. When you are cheerful, it will show in your interactions with others. This will communicate an attractive positive attitude to others

Number 10: Be the type of person that you want to attract. There is a saying that “like attracts like.” If you are looking for open and honest people, then be open and honest yourself. If you want to attract someone who is athletic and has a fit lifestyle, be in shape and have a fit lifestyle yourself

By following these 10 tips, you will be well on your way to attracting new people into your life.

First of all, let me start off my saying that if you are under 18, get a life first! What I mean is to focus on school and strive to go to college. Take that degree and cash it into a good paying job. After that, you will be ready to settle down. The odds are against you if you marry at a young age. The divorce rate is over 80% for couples married between ages 18 and 22.

Relationships are complicated and will ruin your life before then. Don’t fool yourself into thinking that your 15 year old girlfriend will last until you are 24, the age when you are finally able to get married. Guess what? Things can change in 9 years time. You can’t expect people to stay the same. Also, the years between 18 and 24 are the peak times for us to find out more about ourselves.

Ok, so on with the show. Here are my top 10 tips for couples looking to remain on cloud 9.

Number 1: You have to be friends before you can be lovers. Ever heard of that expression? Being friends before lovers is a major factor in relationships. This will allow you to get to know the real person that you are dealing with, not the fake that is trying to impress you on a date. You get to cut out all the dating drama just by being able to laugh at and with each other.

Number 2: NO ONE is perfect and EVERYONE has their flaws. Some people are too tall, some people have a big nose and some people have crooked teeth. However, we have just scratched the surface. Those physical flaws pale in comparison to the personality flaws. Can you stand him leaving the toilet seat up, her being a neat freak, him not taking the trash out daily, or her talking non-stop all day? You better be able to live with that person first before you start babbling “We’re so in love, we’re a match made in heaven”. If you can find the flaws and live with them, then you have a decent chance of making the relationship work.

Number 3: Your partner doesn’t have to be filthy rich when you meet. Not many of us were lucky to be born rich like Paris Hilton. Here’s what I believe about the finance part of the relationship. If your partner is in their 30’s then yes, they better have money and be living in their own place (except if they are waiting for home prices to drop in California).

However, if you are in your early 20’s then money shouldn’t be an issue. What you should be looking for is potential. Your partner should have goals, good morals and ambition. Some great signs are: If they want to start a business, they are aiming for another degree and a higher paying job, or they are driving on the last legs of their beat up car to save money.

Number 4: Improve your communication with each other. This is another big part in making relationships work. Communication means TALKING, not using human antennas or ESP mind reading tricks. Let me give you an example of how important it is. Let’s say your guy has done something stupid, you get angry, and 10 minutes later he doesn’t why you’re upset. Then being a typical woman, you don’t want to tell him because you want him to use his psychic skills to figure out what’s the matter with you.

You could cut out all of this unnecessary tension on your relationship if you would just open up your mouth and talk. God gave you and everyone else a mouth so use it. Stop dropping hints and start acting like real adults. Game playing should be left on the playground for children. The only way a relationship will survive is if you communicate.

Number 5: Another big factor in relationships is compromise. This is one of the hardest parts of a relationship because either no one wants to give up their side or one person in the relationship is constantly giving up their side that it starts to wear them down. The last time I checked, compromising was a two way street.

You have to be willing to compromise and yet, you can’t be the one making all the compromises either. If you keep making all the compromises and it is seemingly one-sided, then just say goodbye to the relationship. Don’t think that when you two get married things will change. The odds are that they won’t. Better work out all the compromises before tying the knot.

Number 6: Give each other breathing room and space. Hanging out with each other 24/7 will only bring about the Law of Diminishing Returns. For the girls, this means letting him hang out with his guy buddies for a few nights a week. For the guys, this means letting her hang out with her lady friends to go shopping. We all need breaks from each other. Hell, I yearn for breaks from my grandma sometimes.

There is nothing wrong with getting out of the house once in awhile and giving you time to miss each other. At the same instance, it is important to set aside time for just the two of you to enjoy being with each other. It’s good to be comfortable with and without each other.

Number 7: On to the physical part of the relationship. There are two things that I want to say about it. First, I admit, it is important in a relationship because without it, a marriage will just wilt away without the passion. I personally believe that you should wait until you are married. But of course my opinion means nothing in this world.

I have heard sex being compared to test driving cars before settling on one to purchase. However, we all know that even after test driving a car there are more features that we have to take into consideration. Same goes with a relationship because there is more to it than just sex.

The other part I want to say about sex is that you better make sure that you don’t become passionate with someone before getting to know them emotionally. There needs to be an emotional bond that exists first that will make sex take your relationship to another level. Getting physical before getting to know someone can be a very dangerous situation that you put yourself in emotionally, physically and mentally.

Number 8: You have a choice as to which partner you would like to take a chance with. I believe that you can love more than one person and that there isn’t just the “ONE” person for everyone. Yes, we all hope and pray to end up with the first one, but how many of us really are lucky to end up with our firsts?

You could try to make love work with a number of people. I think that there are about 5 to 10 people on this earth that you could do that with. We’ve been given free will and it is up to us to choose who we want to make love work with.

This is why when a widowed lady loses her spouse, she can get remarried and still love her second husband just like the first one. Only this time, the love is a bit different. Another example is if things don’t work out in your current relationship, you are always entitled to a choice to love someone else, although it will never be the same as the last one.

Number 9: Show some respect to your partner. There are many times in relationships where I see couples criticize the other person’s flaws in front of other people. It is important to realize that your partner deserves just as much respect as you do. You should be able to talk about decisions and respect each other. However, if you truly don’t agree with something, then speak out about it. Don’t become degrading and start insulting your partner because this is going to end up destroying your relationship.

Number 10: I don’t believe that there is such a thing as relationship bliss. All relationships are is hard work and sacrifice. There are always unexpected events that happen in every relationship. The great thing about them is that they are tests necessary to help understand each other better. If you can make it through the tough times and learn to laugh and support each other, then you will have built a strong relationship.

Did I mention that there is one benefit to having a long distance relationship? It puts money into the pockets of big airline corporations such as Virgin Atlantic, gas stations like Chevron and big phone companies like Verizon. They thank you very much for your business. Unfortunately for couples, there are no benefits for being in a long distance relationship. There is as enormous complexity of factors involved that make it difficult.

Let me tell you about the story of John and Jane. John lives in Los Angeles and Jane lives in New York. They both met at a party when Jane was in town on a business trip. The first problem that the two have is which one is the person that is going to be moving? Is either person willing to sacrifice their job or career for perhaps a lower pay or standard of living? What about leaving friends and family behind? If Jane is not moving to LA and John is not moving to New York, then why are they talking at all?

The second problem is that long distance relationships give a false sense of hope to one another. It may appear to raise each other’s interest level, but in reality, it doesn’t. It is the anticipation of meeting again that causes the interest to rise, creating a false sense of love. Any time your partner calls, you jump at the chance to talk. You never put her on hold or tell her that you’re too busy with something else right now. Everything in your life gets put on hold to give her all of your attention.

The third problem that you have is that you can’t bond if you’re not around. There is a saying that “actions speak louder than words.” You develop trust and comfort with that person when you are spending time together doing things. It allows you to see their personality, how the person reacts and how the person treats you. You can only judge a person’s interest through their actions and body language which you obviously can’t see in a LDR. Romance and love is by and large non-verbal, from the way you look at each other to the simple hugs given at the right moment when you need them. So what is the point of seeing each other every 3 or 6 months?

Problem number four is trying to make up for the distance by talking on the phone way too much. How does talking four or five times on a daily basis allow a relationship to build? Would you believe someone that is thousands of miles away who kept saying “I love you”! It’s all talk and a phone call is definitely a poor substitute for a hug.

How about the 50 emails you send her everyday or the hours you spend instant messaging? What good does that do to building the relationship? But at the end, what do you really find out about that person? Did you go to their house? Did you see how she treats their parents or siblings? Maybe you did go to their place for a weekend. But yeah, you could have gone on a good day where she didn’t treat her parents the way she usually does. Since you never see each other in normal day to day life, you lack the true knowledge of the other person and that is where the big problem lies.

The fifth problem is that it is a waste of money. Depending on where you are flying to and from, you can be spending thousands of dollars per year to see each other (and the false hope also). You may be going over your minutes and end up racking up $400 dollars per month phone bills. What about buying phone cards for international calls on a monthly basis? You may end up spending hundreds of dollars per year purchasing them. All this wasted money can be spent on building a relationship with someone who is close by.

Finally, It is a waste of time waiting for someone that is thousands of miles away. The fact is that no relationship, near of far, is 100% guaranteed. But the mere attempt at a long distance relationship increases the odds close to 100% that it is NOT going to work.

So what makes you think that your long distance love is going to be a hermit once he/she has committed to you? Most likely they won’t be. They still have to go to work, go shopping, stop by the bank and go to the gym. Thus, they will be meeting others too, increasing the likelihood that they will meet someone that is better than you. If you are not there, then they have to fill that void with someone else. It’s just the basic human need to be with others.

For John and Jane, their expectations of each other are skyrocketing even though they haven’t seen each other in months. However, when they do get together as an exclusive couple, they would just end up at the start because they are really strangers to each other. The phone company AT&T almost had it right. Reach out but this time, don’t touch someone.

Ah, you know Valentines day is around the corner when you walk down the seasonal section of your local Walgreens store. The entire aisle is fully decorated with the latest wall paper, stuffed animals and candy. It is the one day out of the year that all the chocolate factories, floral shops and Victoria’s Secret stores can boost sales and earn themselves millions in extra profits. All these companies know one secret fact about couples out there - that there are billions of lovers in this world.

Yes, it may be true that there are billions of lovers in this world. But the real truth is that there isn’t enough love in this world. There isn’t enough love for ourselves, for our significant others or for others in this world. The love that a couple shares may just last a mere week, 6 months or a year and a half. Divorce rates in this country are high and compassion for one another is low. After the love flames out, the break up occurs and then it is off to the next person. This is just like a bee pollinating one flower and then heading toward the next one. Only this time the bee moves on to the next flower faster.

What does it mean to love someone? It means that both individuals have brought to the table all the factors that will make the relationships work. Some of the important components of a loving relationship are trust, respect, faithfulness and hard work. The hard work is required to keep the relationship happy. Many couples do not realize that once they agree to be exclusive, that is when the real work begins. Love is the culmination of the different elements working optimally as one. So how can you show more love in a relationship?

First of all, you have to begin by loving yourself first.  We have to learn to appreciate our strong points and work on our weaknesses. What qualities about yourself are you most proud of? What traits can you bring to the table that will nourish your relationships? Once you have learned to love everything about yourself, you will then be able to love someone else and extend that love to your kids and neighbors.

Next, build the trust that you have for one another. There is a saying out there that says “without trust, there is no love.” Love with complete trust always lasts longer than love without it. Differences in each other’s lifestyles can contribute to the loss of trust.

Let me give you two examples. First, there are couples in a relationship where one is very tight with money and the other is a free spender. Second, there are couples where one is a neat freak and the other lives like a dirty pig. Do those two scenarios sound familiar? The way to build trust is to accept each other for who they are. That way, the differences actually make up for the qualities that we lack.

Finally, build respect for one another. Respect almost goes hand in hand with trust. This is as simple as accepting one another for who they are. Being different is what makes people special in this world. You need to realize that your partner’s feelings are just as important as yours are and that they deserve to be treated well. Respect is built when you don’t discriminate or bully your partner.

Love is learning from each others mistakes and solving problems if they ever arise. Every battle and hardship that a couple experiences and conquers will ultimately display more love. When you begin to show real love, you will realize that it will make the world a better place. After all, that’s what we are really celebrating Valentines Day for. So let’s start showing more love beginning on Valentines Day and continue doing that for the rest of the year.

So what went wrong here in my situation? First, I think it was too late to use it on her because she is probably focused on some other guy. It happens to the best of us. Whenever two individuals start seeing each other more frequently, they kick their friends to the curb.  It’s not as if they do that on purpose. The time they used to spend with their friends is now redirected towards each other. Once a girl is extremely focused on one guy, she wouldn’t have a care in the world for other guys.

Second, she probably never cared about me anyway. That’s too bad because I invested so much time to her (3+ years) and she never gave me a chance. One of my biggest pet peeves is wasting time. Especially, when you put your heart and soul into something and nothing positive results out of it. Gosh, I HATE that so much! It’s time that I can’t buy back and I’ll always be mad about that. I wish I could take it all back.  I could have been some succesful business mogul in that same time period had I focused on myself and my personal projects instead of wasting time on her.

Finally, I believe that the techinique didn’t work because there was a bond that was missing or that wasn’t strong enough. There was not an opportunity for me to show her that I could be there for her. Two examples of this kind of bond strengthening comes from my friend and my cousin. My friend’s father passed away and she told me that her “guy” was there for her the entire time. My cousin was hospitalized after a car accident and her “guy” was at her bedside the entire time until she was discharged. Would I have gone to great lengths to show her that I could be there? I absolutely would have. See how effective the technique would be once that strong bond has been created? It would drive them crazy. They might actually end up being mad because you left for a short period of time.

I still believe that “dropping them cold” is a useful technique for people out there. What you are doing is giving the gift of “missing you.” It has to be used in the beginning of the courtship to be the most effective. You wouldn’t buy some stock at the high end of the price range when it is too late right?

So what can you readers learn from my stupid mistakes?

First, there’s a reason why there are 5 billion people in this world. When one person isn’t willing to give you a chance, don’t wait because it’s not worth it. You will just end up wasting your time and precious energy. There are others out there and remember, THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE BETTER! 

Second, take care of yourself first and the rest will follow. Focus on making yourself better. Learn that piano, buy that real estate investement or open up that business. Once you have your own house, nice car and other material things, girls will start to give you a chance even if you are uglier than Shrek and his wife.

Finally, a warning to those who love to say “let’s just be friends.” It doesn’t work and it only makes the guy stick around to try and prove his love to you. Then it ends up getting worse because you get annoyed and he wonders why you keep running away. So don’t say it because he is wasting his time with someone who will never give him a chance. On top of that, you are denying him an opportunity with someone who is willing to give him a chance.

I don’t know about you but I am tired of spending every weekend at home with no one by my side. The holidays haven’t help much as those holiday blues just make me end up feeling worse. It’s the same old every holiday.  Downing 10 bottles of vodka, seeing the same relatives and hearing the same stupid Viagra jokes. I always wonder to myself, ”Which caves are all the good ones hiding at?”

So, you’ve tried the bar and club scene and are tired of it huh? Perhaps you are a retired club scene person. Most of us think we’ll never meet somebody great in these places and you are 100% correct. But why do we keep going back anyway? I guess it’s because we all think that there aren’t any better alternatives.

But guess what? There are great places to meet people. So forget the club and bar scene and check out these awesome places. These are the places that you want to be to meet some fabulous people. The neat thing about them is that many of them have little or no competition. How do you like them apples?

The gold mines for guys are:
Shoe stores: These places are jam packed with women. Just go up to the nearest unattached female and ask her to help you pick out a new pair of shoes. See where it goes from there.

Bookstores: This is another great place to meet women. They love reading, especially at the magazine section. Also try hanging out at the coffee shop area of the bookstore. This is the place to be if you’re interested in dating someone with brains.

Museums: These places are full of women that are there to either admire the beauty of the paintings or to study them at a deeper level. Read up on the main attractions before you head out so that you have something to talk about.

The gold mine for gals are:
The driving range: Guys are crazy about golf these days thanks to Tiger Woods. Spend an afternoon in the sun swinging at a bucket full of golf balls. Men especially go crazy over women who can swing a mean club.

Music Clubs: Get together with your girlfriends for a night of music at a club for local bands. The guys are all up there on the stage for you. The only drawback to this place is that the atmosphere may be too loud for you to hold a conversation. Start a converstaiton with them by letting them know what a great song they just played.

Car Shows: Guys love their cars as much as they do their women. All this has spawned the Fast and the Furious movies. The best part about this place is that you don’t need to know much about cars. Just go up and give them a nice compliment about their car!

For everybody:

Your friend’s company picnic or party: This is a great place to meet people. Pair up with another single friend and go have fun at his/her company’s party. These events are social, and in addition, you know everybody there has a job and isn’t standing in the unemployment line.

Volunteer work: Check out the volunteer groups just for singles. Not only are you helping to make the world a better place, you are increasing your chances of meeting like-minded individuals.

This is a list of more great places to meet potentials:
The casinos of Las Vegas or Atlantic City.
The beach: Any beach around the world will do.
Business conferences.
Outdoor concerts and festivals.
Church and church events: Another gold mine of both guys and girls
College or adult education classes.
Music stores (or whatever is left of it since the internet has killed them)
So what are you waiting for? Go out there and find “The One

Please feel free to leave comments and feedback on any of my articles when you are done reading. In addition, tell me what other personal development topics you want to hear about. Thanks.

1. Using vulgar language. This should be cut out of your vocabulary at least for the night. Chicks may dig the long ball, but not the vulgar language. Try not to be Bruce Willis’ Die Hard character John McClane (Yipee Kai Yay…you know the rest!). Cool for the movies, but not in real life. It is a turn off to women because they want a man that is classy and this is one of the ways to show that you are.

2. Having no sense of humor. Even though her jokes aren’t funny, laugh at them anyway. Tease your date like you were at the school playground. I used to tease my tall date frequently. I would tell her that she isn’t tall enough to go out with me. Then I’d call her next time and ask, “Did you grow taller yet?” I still miss that girl, because she was the only one that I found that always laughed at my jokes. Even if your date is sarcastic, come back with another sarcastic line.

 3. Having poor conversation skills. So how’s the weather? What do you do for a living? How many brothers and sisters do you have? No! No! No! See how boring these conversations are. Your date will be yearning for the night to be over in no time. Instead, work on your conversation skills. Ask her about something else that she can describe like her shoes, jewelry, nails, purse. Once you get her talking, she will go on and on without stopping. Just listen intently and ask questions from the stories that she is telling you.

4. Having poor table manners. Slurping soup, eating fast and talking with your mouth full are just some of the ways that you can turn off your date with your bad table manners. Also, don’t forget to serve her first or offer her some of your food. Try playing around with her by trying to feed her.

5.  Being chronically late.  Your date may forgive you for the first time but others won’t. How often does a business hire an employee who was late for their interview?  Almost never! So just remember, if you are late, give them a call and let them know how long before you are going to arrive.

6. Being forgetfull. Try to remember what your date says and take an interest in it. For example, she told you on your last date that she doesn’t drink. On this date she just finished this funny story about how her friend got drunk in Vegas. You then proceed to ask her,”Did you drink?” You just set off the big bomb!

7. Having opposite tastes. This can be anything from the music you listen to, to the books she reads and the movies she watches. So how can you avoid this? There is a technique called mirroring. Basically, it is a technique where you agree that you have something in common. For example, she says,”Oh, I love that movie Serendipity!” Just go along with her and tell her that you love that movie too (even though you hate it).

8. Wearing bad wardrobe. Ok, all you have to remember is the famous saying: “Dress to impress.” Sorry to break this secret to you but, women are just as into looks as guys are. So if you want the date to go well, you better look like a million bucks. You also better be good at matching colors as this goes hand in hand with dressing well.

9. Having a bad haircut. You don’t have to have the hair style of Fabio. But at least have a hairstyle that is decent. Try not to have something too out of the ordinary like a mohawk. If that happens, I suggest you fire the hair cutter from  supercuts and have him practice on your shaggy dog.

10. Having opposing political views. The only way to avoid this is to not talk about it. Politics is a very sensitive issue so don’t go there.

Please feel free to leave comments and feedback on any of my articles when you are done reading. In addition, tell me what other personal development topics you want to hear about. Thanks.

Although Macaroni Grill is one of the coolest restaurants in the country, I can’t help but be traumatized by it every time I pass by one. You see, there was this Macaroni Grill that was 20 minutes from my house. It was supposed to be a date and it turned into a nightmare. I will never forget it. I heard those bad words from her (let’s just be friends) and it turned my world upside down. The worse part was the drive home because it was 20 minutes of PURE SILENCE. I couldn’t drive faster because I was going over the speed limit already. It was torture and all I could think of was that I was just rejected.

That night, my sister asked how the date went. I told her that it was horrible. She then made it worse by telling me something that all guys hate to hear. She said, “No worries, you’re a nice guy. The right girl will come along one of these days.” That was the day that the nice guy in me died forever.I can honestly say after that incident 3 years ago, I have control over my dating life in the way that I want. I’m sure many of you guys who are reading this can relate to my story. I want to let you know that I’ve been there before and it isn’t a great feeling. If I can change for the better, you can too. This is how I kicked Mr. Nice Guy out to the street for good.

1) First of all, you have to be like the army. They send troops to enemy lines in hopes of finding out what they know. Like they say at the end of each G.I. Joe cartoon episode, “Knowing is half the battle!” What I’m trying to say is that you need to know how chicks think, especially about nice guys.

This is a list of what a GUY thinks they should act like: always be nice to her, call her often, become a weakling around her, let her make all the decisions, tell her your feelings too early in the relationship, put your needs before her and listens to her problems.

What a woman really wants is: a confident guy around her, one that knows how to flirt, is a challenge, takes the lead, knows when to admit those feelings, is humorous and leaves time and space for himself.

2) The #1 pick in the 2007 draft is…the jerk. It’s amazing how the jerk gets the women all of the time. Nice guys better get used to this fact of life. Women don’t say, “Oh he’s hot” or “I want to have his children” about the nice guy. If we were to get picked at all, it would be in the 103rd round of the draft. Women will never choose the nice guy as #1 no matter how much you try to beg, explain and kiss butt to a woman.

The great thing is, I’ve sent the troops over to enemy lines already! The report back is opposite of what nice guys think. Don’t believe me? Just keep doing the same things from the previous “guys” list and prepare for many long, lonely winters. If you are a nice guy with women and you aren’t willing to change, then you can pretty much guarantee 100% that you will always struggle with women. So just change ok??

3) Meet Me Halfway. Just like the famous song by Kenny Loggins from the movie Over The Top. What you want to do is have a personality that lands between being a nice guy and being a jerk. Don’t be afraid to groom your personality into one that women find irresistible and attractive. This is for your own good and women will love you for it. Just stop with the dumb excuses like: I want women to like me for who I am, It’s against my morals and  I’m afraid of bad karma if I change. Oh please!!

Nice guys need to become a great guy with added swagger. Since you are already a nice guy, most likely you are already a great guy. Now, we have to work on developing that swagger. A great guy with added swagger is a nice guy who also showcases the behaviors, actions and personality traits that women are attracted to such as: Confidence, humor and flirting. Work on these traits and women will start flocking to you like a wolf on a herd of sheep.

Just remember the fact that women generally don’t want nice guys or maybe they’re too busy chasing after jerks to realize that they do. Also, remember to meet halfway. Be good to women but remember that you come first in your life, then your family, your friends and your girlfriend in that order. Good luck!

Please feel free to leave comments and feedback on any of my articles. In addition, tell me what other personal development topics you want to hear about. Thanks.