You can easily change your outlook in life by doing one simple step. Just by asking yourself HOW instead of WHY, you will be able to get rid of those negative sayings that limit your growth potential.

What you want to do is to pay close attention to the things that you say to yourself either out loud or in your mind. What is it that you are saying to yourself? Do any of following sound familiar? I can’t afford it? Why am I poor? Why can’t I find the love of my life? Why isn’t she calling me back? Why am I so fat?

Our brains are just another smart computer (or even better). The questions that you ask yourself will always get answered like a magic genie in a bottle. Just look at the way you are asking them. If you are posing the questions in a negative frame of mind, then your brain will just spit out negative and useless answers to your questions.

By simply turning those questions around using How, it will help you change your outlook on life and give you helpful ideas to get you on your way.

For example, you ask yourself why am I so fat? Your brain will gladly answer your question by telling you that: You sit on the couch all day watching TV, you’re lazy and do not go exercise, or you eat 20 Twinkies everyday.

However, if you just simply change the question to “How can I lose 20 pounds?” Well, your brain will be more than happy to tell you that you can go running 30 minutes per day/three times per week, start eating more fruits and vegetables and so on. See how a simple change in your question can give you the answers that you seek?

You can take it further by posing your question more specifically such as: “How can I lose 20 pounds in 1 month?” Or “How can I lose 20 pounds in 1 month and have fun doing it?”

Instead of asking “Why can’t I afford it?” (Brain says: you come from a poor family, you don’t have a good job, or you didn’t marry a rich person.) Turn it around and ask “how can I afford it?” Instead of saying “Why can’t I find a nice girl?” Say “How can I find a nice girl?”

By now, you should be getting the point that I am trying to make. Now start practicing and asking yourself HOW instead of WHY on a regular basis. Make it a part of your daily routine. You will soon realize that your outlook on life has shifted to the positive side and that you can practically achieve anything you want!

Research shows that what successful people have in common is a positive attitude. Well, if you UPS can ask “What can brown do for you”? Then you can ask “what can positive thinking do for me”? There are many benefits of developing and having a positive attitude. The first benefit is that it can build hope that your dreams will become reality. Second, it will help you overcome discouragement and past failures. Third, you will become happy with yourself and with others around you. Fourth, you will begin to possess a great deal of self-respect. Fifth, you will begin to attract kindness and ward off negative events. Finally, it will allow you to win over friends and have other people provide full cooperation with you.

So now that you know the benefits of a positive attitude, who would you rather spend time with? The pessimistic individual that always looks at the glass half empty? The angry individual that throws a hissy fit at the smallest of  problems. Or the depressed person whose attitude is “woe is me”? Of course the answer is obvious that you wouldn’t want to spend any time with these people at all. The people that you want to spend time with are the optimistic and confident individuals that are full of life, energy, peace and happiness. 

Having a positive attitude in your life doesn’t automatically come to you. You have to really work at it if you want it to become a part of you. What you want to do is to try and make it a habit. In life, habits can be either positive or negative depending on how you choose them to be. All you need to do is to decide not to allow negative thoughts into your mind and then replace them with positive ones. Once you develop more positive habits, you will realize the influence that it is having on your mind. You will be more alert, more imaginative and more enthusiastic

Make it a part of the way you live. Practice it regularly and it will come to you naturally like riding a bike and chewing gum at same time.

The one thing that you can start doing right now is to have a motto to live by. This motto should be a meaningful word or phrase that will remind you of your commitment to developing a positive attitude. Say it to yourself before you go to work, eat lunch or go to sleep. Use a flash card and place it where you can see it everyday. You can have it in your wallet, on your desk, hanging on the fridge, in the bathroom or taped to the mirror.

Your motto will be a part of your life, so choose one that reflects the true feelings in your heart. The goal of this exercise is to make sure that   person you say you are and the person you really are is one and the same. A few examples of mottos to live by are: do unto others as you would have others do unto you; I can. I will. No matter what; How, not if.

Having a positive attitude will allow you to think and act in a constructive manner. That is what will attract people, success and wealth into your life. Use it to your advantage to make your wants and desires become reality. Your positive attitude will allow you to see things more clearly, allowing you to turn negative event into potential success. Remember that other people will find it irresistible that you possess an optimistic outlook on life.

This principle can be applied to practically any situation in real life. Let me give you a few examples. If you love ice cream, then this law will explain that on your fifth serving of Dryer’s Rocky Road, you eventually will no longer be happy with it. In fact you may become sick of that flavor and despise it.

Another example of this law in effect is in regards to relationships.  The thrills, excitement  and butterflies that you get from your partner decreases the more that you are in contact with them. There have been studies done which show that romantic love only lasts at most 18 months. No wonder couples complain of falling out of love.

Love is a blessing and a curse at the same time. Most people never see the thorns that lie in the blooming of love. The world has seen many relationships where love blossoms and where love goes sour. In the beginning of the relationship, the feeling is amazing. If you were to poll people, most would say that being in love is the best feeling they have ever felt.

However, months later, the Law of Diminishing Returns will cause the love to fade away. This is the time when couples start to see faults in one another. This is the same person in the beginning who they were in love with and that they would spend the rest of each other’s life with. Instead of saying “I have a reason to live now”, they are saying “I have a reason to die now.”

This law also applies to the heroin addict who has to take larger and larger doses just to experience the same high that he got for the very first time. In this case, the more drug the addict took, the less pleasure he got from it. This eventually will lead the addict to taking so much drug that he will eventually overdose from it.

In each of these examples, happiness is affected mostly at the beginning. After a certain level has been achieved (I have satisfied my ice cream craving or I found the love of my life), additional gains (eating more ice cream or spending more time with your love) makes less and less difference to happiness. Happiness is achieved when the basic needs are met rather than when the maximal needs met.

So how can you keep the Law of Diminishing Returns from ruining your happy existence? Unfortunately in life, the saying that “nothing lasts forever” is true. The only exception perhaps is that of a diamond. Yeah, for some reason those seem to last forever.

First, you need to keep in mind that almost anything that can bring you pleasure or happiness is subject to the “Law of Diminishing Returns.” That’s just the way life works. Get in the habit to train yourself in recognizing when the Law is in effect.

For example, let’s say you already finished your second cup of coffee. You are now feeling hyper, restless and agitated. Learn to recognize those signs so that you will not go for the third cup of coffee.

Second, once you become skilled at recognizing the signs of the “Law”, you need to learn to pull back no matter how hard it is for you to do. If you are in a budding relationship, it is important to take it slow as falling too fast will ensure that the “Law of Diminishing Returns” will happen.

In the previous example of the cups of coffee, even if you love drinking coffee and have a hard time giving it up, you need to pull back from drinking more as the benefits will start to diminish. Remember to stop doing things when they give you less and less value in return.

Finally, realize that there are other needs in your life that need to be met. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket. You eventually will become bored with it. Know when to stop and participate in other activities that will give you value in return.

For example, you can’t surf the internet all day and expect not to become bored to death with it. The value of happiness of your time on the internet has gone down. This is time where you bow out and participate in other events that will give you value.

Another example is when you have spent 24/7 in close contact with your special love. Eventually the “law” occurs and the happiness of being close diminishes. This is the perfect opportunity for the both of you to have a girls night out to go shopping or a guys night out having a drink and watching a game.

Indeed, you can have too much of a good thing. Hopefully you will be able to recognize the signs and that you do have the power to change it.

In the 1960’s, a psychologist from New York named Martin Seligman conducted experiments about helplessness. The idea around “learned helplessness” is that humans or animals can learn to believe that they are helpless in a particular situation. The final result is that the human or animal will do nothing about the situation even though they have a chance to. The experiment that Seligman conducted involved dogs that were shocked. When they had an opportunity to escape, they didn’t bother because the dogs thought that it was hopeless. His experiments offered evidence that hopelessness and negative thinking can be learned.

So how do we start learning to be an optimistic person? We do that by having a complete shift in attitude. We have to make our self talk positive. The conversation with ourselves is the most important to change if we want to be optimistic.

First, find out how many negative comments or statements you make in one day. This can be about anything or anyone you feel negative towards. Yelling at your TV doesn’t count for any points.

Now have two jars that are available to you. One jar should be full of coins and the other empty. Preferably, the two jars should be close by on a desk where you spend most of your time. For every negative comment that you find yourself making, drop a coin into the empty jar. Count the number of coins in each jar at the end of the day. Make a comparison between the jars to see if you have made more negative than positive statements.

On the next day list 28 negative statements and write down one statement per index card. For each of following days, take one card and write down a positive response to your negative statement. Have the card with you and read the positive statement 10 times before you start your day.

Repeat the steps after the first month and see how many coins end up in your negative jar. Hopefully, your strong desire to be an optimistic individual will help your realize that you have made some improvement.